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  I smiled and felt Miguel pouring something onto my knee, antiseptic of some kind. I sucked in a breath through my teeth, wincing. Merrick bolted upright and glared at Miguel.

  “Hey,” Miguel held up his hands in surrender. “Just a little peroxide.”

  “It stung a little, that’s all. It’s fine,” I said.

  Then we heard the explosion.

  Everyone turned to look but Merrick kept a firm hand on my shoulder to hold me down. I didn’t want to see it anyway. I had enough of violence and death. I just wanted to forget it all.

  I pulled Merrick back down to me and let him fuss over me as I was so exhausted and couldn’t do much else. He tucked the covers around us and kissed me somewhere where there wasn’t a bruise every thirty seconds. He tucked my wet hair behind me ears, rubbed his hands up and down my body to warm me, murmured sweet things in my mind.

  Ryan detangled himself from the girl, who still refused to talk, and leaned over us.

  “Hey, there. How are you doing?”

  “I’ve been better.”

  He looked aghast.

  “Oh, Sherry. I’m sorry. That was stupid-”

  “I’m just joking, Ryan,” I calmed him. “I’m ok. I’ll be ok,” I corrected.

  For whatever reason my mind waited until that moment to let it all crash over me; everything that had happened, thinking I’d never see my family again, how much I hurt all over. All the things that the Lighters had done to me. All those human enforcers. All my family members surrounding me, who came to save me. All the people who had come through those rooms and didn’t make it out. My lip started to quiver.

  Ryan leaned down to half hug me and it was the last straw. I started to cry.

  I didn’t try to hold back this time. I couldn’t anyway. The tears spilled out and I felt Ryan stiffen. He rubbed my arm.

  “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

  “I’m ok, Ryan. It’s not you. I just can’t...”

  “I know.”

  He pulled back and Merrick enveloped me in his arms once again. And I cried. I cried long and painfully. My body shook with the force of it and it just added to the already very present pain, but I did it anyway.

  I needed to.

  I felt someone rubbing my leg, another person rubbing my hair. Merrick was in my head and surrounding me with his arms and his love which was warm like the sun.

  I decided it was time to stop and felt Merrick wipe the last of the tears away. I looked around the van, embarrassed by my meltdown, and saw Jeff at my head and Marissa behind him, her arms around his neck. They both smiled sadly at me when they saw me looking. Danny was still watching me and I tried to smile at him again. He didn’t look at all convinced that I was ok.

  Miguel kept working on me and Billings was talking to whoever was driving. The woman was back to gripping Ryan’s shirt as if he were her only lifeline, his arms were awkward and loose around her.

  Cain and Lillian were both in their own world in the far back. She was in his lap and they both looked asleep but I doubted they were. He held her close and tight, their faces resting against each other.

  I remembered him agonizing over which one of us to save. I hoped that he didn’t feel bad about that. I understood. Between the two of us, she had been the worse off. Plus, she was the one he loved. And he did love her, I knew that, but I wondered if he knew.

  It all worked out in the end. We were all safe, for now.

  It's Just a sandwich

  Chapter 3 - Lillian

  We’d been home for about an hour.

  Sherry fell asleep or passed out, maybe. She was carried into the bunker by a relieved Merrick. Danny trailed sadly behind and everyone fawned all over them.

  Celeste met Danny at the stairs and wrapped her arms around him, kissing him frantically as he lifted her in a hug. Margo was nowhere in sight.

  Jeff and Marissa slunk down the hall to get away from everyone as Ryan toted that poor frozen stiff girl to a high back chair in the corner.

  She refused to let him go, clinging to his shirt collar and begging him not to leave her there as she looked around frantically at all the even newer faces. She was in hysterics. We didn’t even know her name. He settled in on the floor beside her chair and she seemed to find that acceptable, though she kept his hand in between hers. Her eyes darted from one face to the other.

  Merrick carried Sherry to the couch and Miguel told everyone to stand back just as Lily bolted from her room yelling for Merrick.

  Danny grabbed her before she could reach him, picking her up in his arms.

  “Whoa,” he crooned, “slow down, bug.”

  “Shawwy? Where’s Mommy?” she called loudly, searching all around with her eyes and a few people jerked up their heads.

  Even I had never heard Lily call Sherry ‘mommy’ before.

  “She’s here.”

  He took her over to where Merrick stood so she could see Sherry on the couch. Merrick leaned close to Lily, touching her cheek.

  “Mommy’s ok. She’s just not feeling very good right now. We have to let her sleep for a little while and then I promise you, you can have her, ok? She missed you so much.”

  Lily didn’t look happy or eager about Merrick’s explanation but nodded and rested her head on Danny’s shoulder as he and Celeste carted her away.

  We only brought minimal supplies with us in the van so Miguel ran to get more. He wrapped Sherry’s knees in gauze and pushed a needle in her arm with some yellow clear liquid in it. He spread a cream across her face. She slept through all of his ministrations.

  I overheard him say to Merrick that he was pretty sure she had a concussion and a fractured cheek bone, but he couldn’t be sure. We needed to wait until Sherry woke up and told us what happened to her.

  Cain just stood by me and watched everything happen around us. I wanted to get away. Let Merrick and Sherry spend some recoup time together. But I wasn’t sure if Cain was ready to leave, if he was worried about her and needed to make sure she was alright first.

  I knew he felt bad. I hated it that he had to choose between me and her in the facility; to save her or me. I hate it that he had to deal with it like that, it wasn’t fair to him. As jealous as I got about the situation, it still wasn’t fair for him to have to go through that. Though I was surprised that he chose me.

  I reached over and took his hand. He looked at me and cracked a small smile.

  “Do you want to stay or...” I asked quietly.

  “No. Let’s go make some sandwiches for everyone. None of us have had any lunch anyway,” he suggested.

  “Sure,” I said glad for the distraction.

  So we went and made about twenty turkey sandwiches and three gallons of sweet tea. Then Cain called everyone to eat.

  I took Merrick a plate since he was in no way interested in leaving Sherry’s side. He took it and grabbed my hand.

  “Thank you,” he said looking right into my eyes and I thought I’d never seen eyes that green before.

  “You're welcome, Merrick. It’s just a sandwich.”

  “I’m not talking about the sandwich,” he said meaningfully. “Thank you.”

  “No problem. She would have done it for me.”

  He nodded and let me go and then called out to me before I walked off.

  “Oh, and thanks for the sandwich too,” he said and smiled.

  “You’re welcome,” I said and smiled back.

  I went to Cain in the kitchen. He was sitting on the counter finishing off his sandwich and drinking tea out of a big Mason jar. Billings was just walking out and I heard him mumbling about going to his room, that there were too many people in this place. I walked up to Cain and stood between his knees.

  “Well,” he said and put his arms on my shoulders. “Had enough excitement?”

  “Definitely.”

  “Good. Me too.”

  “Sherry got lucky.”

  “Yeah, I know she did,” he said softly.

  “If Daniel hadn’t
been there-”

  “I know,” he said. I sighed and let my cheek rest on his chest. He spoke into my hair. “I’m glad you’re ok, L.”

  “I’m only ok because of you,” I told him and he took a deep breath. I decided to go ahead and get it out there. “I know what you did. I saw you and I’m really sorry you had to choose between us like that.”

  “I’m not,” he replied surprising me. “I mean, I’m not glad that we were in the situation, but it made me see once and for all what’s the most important thing to me.” He cupped my cheeks and looked straight into my eyes to relay his conviction. “You.”

  I licked my lips that had suddenly become parched and tried to breathe normally.

  Oh my. I was in love with him. How long had I known him? A month? Could you fall completely in love with someone in a month? I guess you could, because I was so in love with him. And he must feel something for me because he told me he was in love with Sherry before and he chose me over her.

  “You aren’t still angry with me, are you?” he asked quietly.

  “No. I thought you’d be angry for having to choose. For choosing me,” I said bluntly.

  “I’m not and I never will be.” He hopped down from the counter and grabbed my hand. “Come on. Come sit with me for a while. There are some things I don’t know about you that I’d like to.”

  “Like what?” I asked wondering if he was thinking of something specific.

  “Everything. We have some time to kill. Everyone’s gonna be so wrapped up in Sherry for the rest of the day we won’t even get a word in with them. I want to know everything about you.”

  “And I can have some questions too?”

  “Of course. Though I have to warn you, prepare to doze, my life was mundane and boring.”

  “As was mine.”

  “I’ll be the judge of that. Sit here.”

  He’d walked us to the second room and sat me on the loveseat. He went and turned on the radio and then came back to settle in on the end opposite me, putting my feet in his lap.

  “Ok. So, you’re an only child, right?”

  “Yes.”

  “And your parents were missionaries.” I nodded and he looked pensive. “Did you go to prom?”

  “Yes. Did you?”

  “No. With who?”

  “Michael. Why didn’t you go?”

  “I was working, but didn’t have the money to rent a tux anyway. Both my parents were laid off from work at the time. They were laid off a lot. Ok, how about extracurricular?”

  “I was on the dance squad.”

  “Really...” he drawled and smiled deviously. “That I’d like to have seen.”

  I laughed and shook my head at him, tucking the hair behind my ear. Not only did I roll my eyes at his typical male response but I was blushing furiously at the look he was giving me.

  “You? Wait- football?”

  “Yes,” he sighed. “Cliché quarterback dated the head cheerleader.”

  “Aha. So, how long did that last?”

  “We got engaged right after high school.”

  “Really! You were engaged? Wow. So...what happened? You’re not secretly married are you?”

  “Nope. I called off the wedding. She was more interested in her boss’ tongue than she was in marrying me.”

  Oh no. She cheated on him.

  “Oh, I’m sorry.”

  “It’s ok. I didn’t love her.” He held up his hands. “I know that sounds bad but we’d been together so long, it was just routine or habit for us, you know? Neither of us cried when it was over.” He squeezed my foot. “So, did you and Michael have a big wedding?”

  “Nope. My parents were gone already on a mission trip and I didn’t have any other family. And Michael’s dad had passed away a few years before. His mom came to the church with us but she was less than thrilled about him marrying me. We had a small ceremony with only about fifteen people. Mostly our school friends.”

  He nodded, thinking. Rubbing his bottom lip with his thumb.

  “Favorite color?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

  “Red. Yours?”

  “Don’t really have one. I’m eclectic, easy to please.”

  “Uhuh. What’s your least favorite food?”

  “Ok. Don’t laugh, but it’s birthday cake.”

  “What?” I laughed. “How can you not like birthday cake?”

  “Easy. I hate it. It’s too sweet and spongy then gooey and always has those annoying sprinkles. I can’t stand it.” He made a face like he was imagining taking a bite and was disgusted making me giggle. “What’s yours?”

  “Bananas.”

  “Texture or taste?”

  “Both, but mostly texture. Matter of fact, I love banana flavored candy, just not bananas themselves.”

  “You are strange,” he goaded in his familiar sarcastic way.

  “Hey!” I kicked my foot gently into his stomach and he tickled my foot making me giggle harder. “So, I already know you play guitar and you were a Sergeant in the Marines. I know you love kids and like to work. You have a green thumb and really love your sweet tea. What else?”

  “There’s not a lot left to tell you.”

  “Oh, come on,” I pleaded. “What is something nobody knows about you? I won’t tell anyone,” I said sweetly and smiled at him.

  “Hmmm.” He touched his tongue to his lip ring, thinking. “I once prank called a girl I liked in the ninth grade. I was trying to get her to meet me at the movies without knowing who I was because I thought she’d say no. She hung up on me. The next day at school she got this other guy in trouble for stalking because she thought it was him. I never told anyone it was me. No one.”

  “Wow. I’m so happy to be privy to your big bad secret,” I said with mock seriousness.

  “Yo,” he said and pointed at me, “back in the day, I was bad boned. I was tough, ok? Rugged. People feared me.”

  “I’m sure they did,” I said blandly to goad him.

  “Are you doubting my mad badness?”

  “Oh, no. Now way. Certainly not.”

  “Oh, L.” He shook his head. “You are skating dangerously close to skepticism.”

  “Oh, I’m not skating. I’m there.”

  I laughed at his playful scowl.

  “You are gonna pay for that, lovely.” He jumped up and grabbed me as I made a try to run but he overpowered me bracing himself over me on the couch length wise. “You may be cute, but you are not immune to the rules.”

  I giggled. “And what rules are you referring to?”

  “The rules of opposite sex etiquette. Don’t challenge the manliness of the guy that is within tickle range.”

  “Ooh. Good rule. I’ll remember that.”

  “You better. I’ll let you off with a warning this time.”

  “What’s my penalty?” I asked and bit my lip to tease him.

  “What do you think?” He leaned in so close his lips were almost grazing mine.

  “I think...that you are awfully cheesy, mister,” I crooned sweetly.

  “That’s it! Last straw!” he yelled and began to tickle me on my sides.

  I screamed and giggled and squirmed, but there was no getting loose.

  “Ok! Ok! I give. You are so, so manly! You are rugged and handsome and…” I stopped to gasp and scream as he intensified his assault. “So manly! Please! You are so manly!”

  He smiled at me in triumph and stopped tickling. He let his weight press me further into the couch.

  “That’s right, and don’t you forget it.”

  “How could I with a display like that?”

  He chuckled and continued to look at me. He brushed the hair off my face that had fallen over my eye then he ran his thumb over my bottom lip making my heartbeats gallop. I decided to take the initiative this time. I pulled him down to me by his shirt collar.

  He seemed pleasantly surprised, given by his smirk.

  I kissed the hollow of his neck and had the pleasure of hearing his brea
th catch. I kissed my way up and bit his lip ring playfully. He chuckled before taking over and pressing our lips together. He stayed braced over me on his elbows as his mouth ravished mine. After a few minutes he pulled back quickly. I was confused by the sudden change of pace but he just scooped me up and took me to the bed on the far wall.

  He probably wasn’t too comfortable sprawled out with me on the loveseat I imagined. He placed me gently to the bed and picked up right where he left off.

  His mouth was eager as his hand took a tour of my body in caresses and chaste advances. His fingers went just under the hem of my shirt but no further and he pulled me closer to him by my belt loops.

  It seemed we stayed like that for hours. My lips were swollen and my jaw was chafed deliciously from his stubble. My fingers were sore and stiff from fisting his shirt for so long. It was the first time we’d just been able to completely be alone and together like that.

  Eventually, we stopped to breathe, but he kept his hands on me. Our noses were touching while we lay on our sides. I drifted off into a sleep, restful and needed.

  When I woke up some time later, I smelled dinner cooking. Cain’s face was pressed into my hair and he was still asleep. Our arms and legs were tangled. I knew there was no way to get free without waking him up, so I stayed there. It was where I wanted to be anyway.

  An Undulated Fate

  Chapter 4 - Merrick

  Sherry slept for hours. I didn’t move her again because Miguel wasn’t sure of the extent of her injuries. So, there she stayed on the couch in all her broken splendor.

  Lily was anxious and persistent to wake her. She didn’t understand what was going on and Danny wasn’t much better. He drifted our way every few minutes or so, peeking over the couch and pursing his lips. I assured him I’d call him in his mind the second she woke up.

  I didn’t leave her side. This surprised no one, including me. This was standard conduct for me; Sherry watch. I just couldn’t leave her. So I stayed watch and held Lily for a while before she tottered off to more fun ventures, and fended off questions for and about Sherry.

  Well after supper was done, Cain and Lillian came into the room looking disheveled and incandescent. They walked hand in hand over to me and acted extremely happy. I tried not to take it personally on Sherry’s behalf.